NSFWI met my girlfriend right after she had just gotten out of a fling. She comes from a super conservative family. She’s the kind who always has to tell her parents where she’s going, doesn’t normally have sleepovers at a guy’s place, never had a one-night stand, and generally plays by the rules.
But with this one friend of hers; "this fling". She bent all of those boundaries. She slept over at his house, fooled around with him (2nd base), and broke rules she had otherwise stood by her whole life. When I found all this out early in our relationship, it ate at me. We’d argue, and I couldn’t help but feel some type of way about it.
Call me insecure, but I couldn’t understand why she could break her rules for him and not for me. I am the guy she loves, the one she has committed to. And yet, when I’d ask for something as simple as a sleepover, it was like running into a wall. That sting never fully went away.
Still, we moved past it. We grew, we loved each other, and eventually she gave me what no one else had; her virginity. That mattered, and I knew it. But somewhere deep down, the memory of "THAT GUY" always lingered like a shadow in the background of our relationship.
Fast forward three years. One night I went out drinking, got far too wasted, and ended up at a sauna trying to sweat it out. Fate decided to play its hand, because who do I run into but "That Guy" Her old fling.
Drunk, reckless me went up to him. One thing led to another, and before I even knew what was happening, he had his hands on me. He got me off right there, and I came all over his face.
As bizare as that sounds, something shifted in me after that moment. It’s like the ghost I’d been fighting in my head for years got exorcised in the strangest, most unexpected way possible. For the first time, I felt free of him—like that chapter of jealousy and insecurity was finally closed.
I moved on.
