NSFWI swear, I think that night factory-reset my brain. PUTANGINA, all because of Jägermeister. 
So recently, we had a high ****** reunion. Nothing special at first—just the usual catching up, drinking, talking shit about old classmates, remembering embarrassing teenage moments, ganon.
Then I saw my old girl bestie.
For context, she used to have a HUGE crush on me back in high ******. Like, girl was down bad HAHAHA. And yes, I know what you're thinking—I'm a girl too, so why am I saying "girl bestie"? Because apparently I have a type: girls who make questionable decisions.
Anyway, she came up to me for a beso. Normal lang, right?
Except the bitch kissed my cheek.
I immediately pulled away like, "GIRL???"
I rolled my eyes at her and she just laughed.
She goes, "Hindi ka pa rin nagbabago."
I was like, "Amacanna te," HAHAHAHA.
We ended up drinking with everyone and just having fun. Nothing weird. At least, not yet.
As the night went on, though, I started getting REALLY drunk. Like that specific kind of drunk where everything becomes funny and suddenly you're oversharing your entire life story to people you haven't talked to in years.
At some point, I noticed her staring at me.
I looked back and thought, Wait... bakit parang ang init niya tonight?
She looked really good. Like, REALLY good. Nice outfit, hair done, confidence was at 100. And I suddenly remembered that stupid crush she used to have on me.
I laughed to myself because I was like, Girl, after all these years???
But then she started acting different around me.
She'd come closer, hug me, sit beside me, tease me, all that shit.
I kept joking around and pushing her away like, "KADIRI KA HAHAHAHA!"
But honestly?
I wasn't exactly uncomfortable.
I was just pretending I was.
At one point she hugged me from behind and I literally had to pry her hands off me.
"PUTANGINA MO, MALANDI KA PA RIN!" I told her.
She just laughed.
Later, I sat down on the sofa to chill because I was getting dizzy. Then this girl followed me and, instead of sitting beside me like a normal human being, she sat right on my lap.
I just stared at her.
She stared at me.
And we both started laughing.
"Girl, ano ginagawa mo?" I asked.
"Umupo," she said.
"Sa lap ko?!"
"Eh may space."
PUTANGINA HAHAHAHAHA.
I was too drunk to argue anymore, so I just let her sit there for a bit.
Eventually everyone started leaving around 3 AM. Some had motorcycles, some still had long drives home, so people were saying their goodbyes.
I was about to book a MoveIt when she suddenly went, "Sama ka muna sa apartment ko. Chismis pa tayo."
Then she showed me another bottle of Jägermeister.
I should've known that was a fucking trap.
But apparently my drunk ass had no survival instincts.
So I went.
Pagdating sa apartment, she told me to sit on the sofa and handed me some clothes.
"Change ka. Mukhang uncomfortable yang suot mo."
So I went to the bathroom and changed.
When I came out, she was already wearing a tank top and shorts.
I just looked away.
Okay. Don't look. Don't fucking look.
Because for some reason, the alcohol had already removed whatever common sense I had left.
We kept drinking and talking.
Eventually, somehow, the conversation shifted to relationships and sex.
She told me she'd been single and, as she put it, "tuyot" for years.
I laughed my ass off.
Then she asked me about my own love life.
I joked around and said, "Girl, parehas lang tayo."
We both laughed.
Then there was this weird silence.
You know that kind of silence where both people suddenly realize the conversation has gone somewhere it probably shouldn't?
Yeah.
That one.
I was about to change the subject when she suddenly looked at me and said something that completely caught me off guard.
"Okay lang ba kung... tayo?"
I swear my brain just stopped.
Like...
Huh?
Wait.
WHAT?
I couldn't even process it properly because I was already drunk as fuck.
We just stared at each other for a few seconds.
And somehow, one thing led to another.
I don't even remember every detail clearly. I just remember us laughing nervously, the awkwardness disappearing, and realizing that this was actually happening.
And honestly?
It was one of those completely unexpected nights where you wake up the next morning and go:
"PUTANGINA. DID THAT REALLY HAPPEN?"
I eventually passed out.
When I woke up around 7 AM, we were literally still cuddled up together.
I froze for a second.
Then I slowly got up, got dressed, and left.
No dramatic goodbye.
No deep conversation.
Just me walking out of the apartment like I wasn't mentally screaming the entire time.
And the funniest part?
She never messaged me afterward.
Not even a "nakauwi ka?"
Nothing.
And honestly?
THANK GOD. HAHAHAHAHA.
Because what the fuck was I even supposed to say?
"Good morning! So... about last night..."
NOPE.
I'd rather pretend Jägermeister erased that entire chapter of my life.
But every once in a while, I remember that night and just stare at the ceiling like:
Girl...
What the actual fuck were we doing?
Anyway, if anyone asks, nothing happened.
I was drunk.
She was drunk.
Jägermeister did it.
Case closed. HAHAHAHAHA.
So recently, we had a high ****** reunion. Nothing special at first—just the usual catching up, drinking, talking shit about old classmates, remembering embarrassing teenage moments, ganon.
Then I saw my old girl bestie.
For context, she used to have a HUGE crush on me back in high ******. Like, girl was down bad HAHAHA. And yes, I know what you're thinking—I'm a girl too, so why am I saying "girl bestie"? Because apparently I have a type: girls who make questionable decisions.
Anyway, she came up to me for a beso. Normal lang, right?
Except the bitch kissed my cheek.
I immediately pulled away like, "GIRL???"
I rolled my eyes at her and she just laughed.
She goes, "Hindi ka pa rin nagbabago."
I was like, "Amacanna te," HAHAHAHA.
We ended up drinking with everyone and just having fun. Nothing weird. At least, not yet.
As the night went on, though, I started getting REALLY drunk. Like that specific kind of drunk where everything becomes funny and suddenly you're oversharing your entire life story to people you haven't talked to in years.
At some point, I noticed her staring at me.
I looked back and thought, Wait... bakit parang ang init niya tonight?
She looked really good. Like, REALLY good. Nice outfit, hair done, confidence was at 100. And I suddenly remembered that stupid crush she used to have on me.
I laughed to myself because I was like, Girl, after all these years???
But then she started acting different around me.
She'd come closer, hug me, sit beside me, tease me, all that shit.
I kept joking around and pushing her away like, "KADIRI KA HAHAHAHA!"
But honestly?
I wasn't exactly uncomfortable.
I was just pretending I was.
At one point she hugged me from behind and I literally had to pry her hands off me.
"PUTANGINA MO, MALANDI KA PA RIN!" I told her.
She just laughed.
Later, I sat down on the sofa to chill because I was getting dizzy. Then this girl followed me and, instead of sitting beside me like a normal human being, she sat right on my lap.
I just stared at her.
She stared at me.
And we both started laughing.
"Girl, ano ginagawa mo?" I asked.
"Umupo," she said.
"Sa lap ko?!"
"Eh may space."
PUTANGINA HAHAHAHAHA.
I was too drunk to argue anymore, so I just let her sit there for a bit.
Eventually everyone started leaving around 3 AM. Some had motorcycles, some still had long drives home, so people were saying their goodbyes.
I was about to book a MoveIt when she suddenly went, "Sama ka muna sa apartment ko. Chismis pa tayo."
Then she showed me another bottle of Jägermeister.
I should've known that was a fucking trap.
But apparently my drunk ass had no survival instincts.
So I went.
Pagdating sa apartment, she told me to sit on the sofa and handed me some clothes.
"Change ka. Mukhang uncomfortable yang suot mo."
So I went to the bathroom and changed.
When I came out, she was already wearing a tank top and shorts.
I just looked away.
Okay. Don't look. Don't fucking look.
Because for some reason, the alcohol had already removed whatever common sense I had left.
We kept drinking and talking.
Eventually, somehow, the conversation shifted to relationships and sex.
She told me she'd been single and, as she put it, "tuyot" for years.
I laughed my ass off.
Then she asked me about my own love life.
I joked around and said, "Girl, parehas lang tayo."
We both laughed.
Then there was this weird silence.
You know that kind of silence where both people suddenly realize the conversation has gone somewhere it probably shouldn't?
Yeah.
That one.
I was about to change the subject when she suddenly looked at me and said something that completely caught me off guard.
"Okay lang ba kung... tayo?"
I swear my brain just stopped.
Like...
Huh?
Wait.
WHAT?
I couldn't even process it properly because I was already drunk as fuck.
We just stared at each other for a few seconds.
And somehow, one thing led to another.
I don't even remember every detail clearly. I just remember us laughing nervously, the awkwardness disappearing, and realizing that this was actually happening.
And honestly?
It was one of those completely unexpected nights where you wake up the next morning and go:
"PUTANGINA. DID THAT REALLY HAPPEN?"
I eventually passed out.
When I woke up around 7 AM, we were literally still cuddled up together.
I froze for a second.
Then I slowly got up, got dressed, and left.
No dramatic goodbye.
No deep conversation.
Just me walking out of the apartment like I wasn't mentally screaming the entire time.
And the funniest part?
She never messaged me afterward.
Not even a "nakauwi ka?"
Nothing.
And honestly?
THANK GOD. HAHAHAHAHA.
Because what the fuck was I even supposed to say?
"Good morning! So... about last night..."
NOPE.
I'd rather pretend Jägermeister erased that entire chapter of my life.
But every once in a while, I remember that night and just stare at the ceiling like:
Girl...
What the actual fuck were we doing?
Anyway, if anyone asks, nothing happened.
I was drunk.
She was drunk.
Jägermeister did it.
Case closed. HAHAHAHAHA.