Should I wait until after I get married?

[PHC_Adie]

Hi, Im 28 (M)years old nung makachat ko yung jowa ko hanngang ngayon, 24 (F) sya that time, so ayun nga, naging mag on kami, 1 year and 7 months na kami ngayon. Sa loob na yan, nagvivideo call kami then minsan kapag natuturn on kami, we do naked like normal things sa magjowa. I will be honest, i am still a virgin and sinasabi ko sa kanya na kung pwede ko ba sya makasex, ang sagot nya, ayaw pa daw nya kasi Virgin pa rin daw sya at gusto lang daw nya gawin yun kapag naikasal na sya, I respect naman sya.


Pero dahil makulit ako at inaya ko ng inaya, napapayag ko sya dalahin sa Hotel kaso may condition sya, bawal daw ipenetrate sya or ipasok sa loob kasi gusto daw nya kasal muna. Pumayag na rin ako baka may chance din makapasok haha. Yun nga nung nagfirst meet namin, kumain muna kami tas hotel na, first time ko magkita ng personal ng dede at puki haha, sobrang tinigasan ako haha, kaso yun nga lang hanggang romansa ko lang sya kasi ayaw nya talaga ipapasok kaya sabi nya hanggang rub na lang daw muna, kahit gusto ko ipasok , tinutulak nya ako at parang ang hirap talaga ipasok kasi daw Virgin pa daw sya. So ayun nga, nakakaraos naman din kami kaso ako parang nakukulangan kasi parang gusto ko talaga maipasok.


Kaso yun nga wala talaga ako magawa kasi ayaw nya kaya nirerespeto ko sya dun. Marami ng beses kami naghohotel at 3 hours lang lagi, wala penetration, rub lang at bj ganun haha.


Guys, paano ko kaya maconfirm if virgin pa sya kahit walang penetration?


Kasi baka pagtawanan nyo ako kasi bat di ko sya makanton, sabihin nyo mahina ako. Kaso ayaw nya talaga eh, tama lang ba ginagawa ko na intayin sya na pumayag? O mahina lang talaga ako dumiskarte?


Dagdag ko lang din, sa sobra kong desperado na makanton sya, naghanap ako ng way kasi nagkwento sya about dun sa lalaking naka MU nya na may jowa, knowing na alam nya at katrabaho pa nila sa production, nagsisisi daw sya bakit sya pumatol dun.


Nakwento nya nga na pumupunta yung guy na yun sa boarding house nya, at natanong ko sa kanya kung meron bang nanyare sa kanila. Ang sabi nya is muntikan na daw pero napigilan daw nya ang sarili kasi dun lang daw nya ibibigay sa taong kaya syang panindigan at sabi nya narealize daw nya ang habol lang pala daw ng lalaki is makabembang, kaso may pagdududa pa rin ako eh.


Then yun nga may phone syang nasira, so hiningi ko na at napaayos ko, nandun pa rin yung old convo na deleted na sa messenger nya, nabasa ko dun may mga usapan sila indirect about sex pero hindi naman vulgar, like gagawa daw ng baby, tapos may pic at video din sila magkahawak ang kamay kasama yung cheater na pinatulan nya kaya sa twing maaalala ko yun, parang gusto ko na lang maging bato, iba kasi ang tingin ko sa kanya bago ko sya makilala, tapos may ganun pala syang history na pumatol na sa may jowa kahit alam nya. Di ba pag naalala mo ganun parang nakakainis kahit wala ka pa naman sa buhay nya dati pa, retroactive jealousy.


So kapag naalala ko yun nagiging toxic ako aminado ako, at paulit ulit ko sya tinatanong kung ano ang totoo, nagagalit sya kasi daw puro duda daw ako, minsan nga dahil nakulitan na sya sakin, tinanong ko kung same lang din ba ang ginagawa nila dati na tulad namin, sabi nya oo, nagsesex kami, happy ka na? Para kasing sarcastic pa ng sagot nya, di ko alam if ano talaga, kung ginagalit nya lang ba ako. Sinasabi nya na sige maniwala ka sa duda mo, never daw sya magpapaganun sakin.


I know na dapat di ko na alamin, pero as A virgin karapatan ko din malaman kung totoo ba ang sinasabi nya gusto ko lang syang maging honest sakin. 50/50 ako, minsan naniniwala ako na Birhin pa sya minsa hindi. Ewan ang gulo ko.


Mahal na mahal ko sya pero deserve ko din talaga kung totoo lahat ng sabi nya sakin. Naguguluhan talaga ako sa mga sagutan nya. Deserve ko ako ang makauna sa kanya kasi nirerespeto ko sya sa gusto nya kahit masakit sa ego ko na di ko sya makanton.


Naniniwala pa rin ba kayo sa SEX AFTER MARRIAGE ? Ako kasi syempre lalaki ako gusto ko na sya makasex talaga with penetration kaso siguro di pa sya fully trusted sakin, ano bang tips nyo na mapapayo. Naiinggit ako sa mga magjowang kakameet pa lang, nagtitirahan na haha.


Payuhan nyo naman ako mga experts. Sayang ang bayad sa hotel din kasi eh Hahaha, nakakailan beses na puro rub lang lagi, may way kaya para mapapayag din.


Any advise guys. First time lang magkajowa. Any hate comments or good advise is appreciated. Salamat.

 

[Aurion]

First thing's first.

You didn't respect her wishes about Sex after Marriage. Let's get that thing straight since you attempted or had malicious attempts to penetrate her despite her being against it.

I may not know the whole story but you're weak at manipulating or giving your Girlfriend assurance that you're the partner she's looking for.

I also find it weird how it was easy for her to show her body let alone to an MU... which doesn't classify as a Girlfriend and Boyfriend.. well no judgement to the Girl since she learned her lesson but that says a lot about a whole other personality of her especially after the fact that she isn't considerate of your feelings of wanting to know the Truth which you totally deserve since you're both in a Relationship.




Best advice:

Pursuit:

If you plan to pursue her despite all the Red Flags and wanna have sex with her show how passionate you are about wanting to fulfill her intentions.

Give Oral Sex or Sex in general, a rest even if it's within consent.

Instead talk about intercourse or sexual activities frequently since it will eventually build up desire to make her wanna do it with you while you shower her with Love and Assurance that you're going to be the partner that she will eventually marry, leading you to build up trust, love, assurance, and then reach to intercourse before marriage.






Don't Pursue:

Personal opinion, this might be the best option after hearing how badly you guys treat each other.

Focus on yourself first and find someone that treats you better than her...

No cap, it will definitely hurt like a bitch when you break up but that's normal..

It's a part of life.

You're not alone.. and if you do take this step..

Then you're a brave person that values yourself and I'm sure that's what everyone needs to find first before stepping into a relationship.

 

[PHC_Adie]

First thing's first.

You didn't respect her wishes about Sex after Marriage. Let's get that thing straight since you attempted or had malicious attempts to penetrate her despite her being against it.

I may not know the whole story but you're weak at manipulating or giving your Girlfriend assurance that you're the partner she's looking for.

I also find it weird how it was easy for her to show her body let alone to an MU... which doesn't classify as a Girlfriend and Boyfriend.. well no judgement to the Girl since she learned her lesson but that says a lot about a whole other personality of her especially after the fact that she isn't considerate of your feelings of wanting to know the Truth which you totally deserve since you're both in a Relationship.




Best advice:

Pursuit:

If you plan to pursue her despite all the Red Flags and wanna have sex with her show how passionate you are about wanting to fulfill her intentions.

Give Oral Sex or Sex in general, a rest even if it's within consent.

Instead talk about intercourse or sexual activities frequently since it will eventually build up desire to make her wanna do it with you while you shower her with Love and Assurance that you're going to be the partner that she will eventually marry, leading you to build up trust, love, assurance, and then reach to intercourse before marriage.






Don't Pursue:

Personal opinion, this might be the best option after hearing how badly you guys treat each other.

Focus on yourself first and find someone that treats you better than her...

No cap, it will definitely hurt like a bitch when you break up but that's normal..

It's a part of life.

You're not alone.. and if you do take this step..

Then you're a brave person that values yourself and I'm sure that's what everyone needs to find first before stepping into a relationship.

palagi naman napag uusapan yung about sex but minsan ayaw nya na pag usapan. I really really love her kahit ganun ang ugali nya. Gusto ko lang din maranasan yung ginagawa ng typical na magjowa na hindi namin nagagawa. Yeah, medyo disappointed ako but I respect her.

 

[Aurion]

palagi naman napag uusapan yung about sex but minsan ayaw nya na pag usapan. I really really love her kahit ganun ang ugali nya. Gusto ko lang din maranasan yung ginagawa ng typical na magjowa na hindi namin nagagawa. Yeah, medyo disappointed ako but I respect her.

So ano choice mo

 

[Aurion]

palagi naman napag uusapan yung about sex but minsan ayaw nya na pag usapan. I really really love her kahit ganun ang ugali nya. Gusto ko lang din maranasan yung ginagawa ng typical na magjowa na hindi namin nagagawa. Yeah, medyo disappointed ako but I respect her.

Baka gusto mo lang naman ata maka bembang hahaha

 

[PHC_Adie]

Baka gusto mo lang naman ata maka bembang hahaha

hahaha oo naman boss kaso eh ayaw pa nya eh

 

[spicefly]

lala, boss. upon reading your statement, the whole conversation volumes sex and lust within the relationship. huwag ka nang maniwala sa social construct ng virginity. birhen man o hindi, hindi nag-iiba iyong lasa non. masyado kang bothered about sa past niya which regards about her sex life (kung meron man). hindi na love iyan, purong libog at pagnanasa. also, i agree with the statement above—you didn't respect her no since you tried penetrating it.

 

[palagingutog]

nalilibugan ka lang ata boss